Thursday, July 21, 2005


It took a while for me to write that word, as I have had rather a lot of the alcoholic variety of drink. My head hurts, and I have to be up at 8am tomorrow morning to take Issie to school. I hasten to add that I didn't know this until after I had already had about 5 pints; curse the lack of communication in this house.

So, now I'm trying my hardest to write in coherent english with the big delay on the computer and the big delay in my head confusing matters no end. I'm having to think more than I should about what I'm typing and where my fingers are going, I've already missed the keyboard completely a few times now.

I need a wee now, excuse me.

...And I'm back, wasn't that fun.

I was wondering what effect, if any, Alcohol has on socialisation and general grooviness. I have been sitting around drinking and talking with my friends in the garden all evening and I was wondering, how much of the rambling strange conversation was due to me being bored and how much was due to me being drunk. I've been told time and time again that you dont need booze to have fun, but I'm not sure.

While I think that it is of course possible to have a good time without drinking - most of my life from the age of 0 to 17 is testament to this fact - there is a certain flavour of fun that can only be reached by getting really, really munted. In the same way that many tribes think that a certain kind of enlightenment and grooviness with the almighty dudes can only be reached be eating-of-the-sacred-cactus or whatever, popping microdots or drinking mescaline if that's your thing. Either way, a state that can only be reached by indulging in the forbidden pharmaceuticals.

need a wee again.

...Wow isn't my life exciting, you're getting it real time here.

oh man.

I think that I've just been told too many times that I don't need alcohol and that it doesn't do anything other than make you a prick. I'm getting pretty bored with that whole argument, I'm sure it has some effect, although what that effect is still evades me. Perhaps it's just me, but being told one thing for long enough generally makes me want to do the other. My head is telling me that reliance on external forces to make me sociable is a sign of weakness.

It probably is, fuck. I need to stop drinking, I've got a bad headache now and I've got to be up in 7 hours. I'm sure the evening was different because of the alcohol, but whether it was better or worse is something that I can't really say.

Fuck, I'm lonely... that's something that alcohol makes more obvious, although I'd rather it didn't, bollocks.

I'm going to take some fizzygoodmakenice and go to sleep now.

oh man.